12/20/03 Dilemma Essay

As I walked to my house, I played a game trying only to step on the shadows of the trees that are projected onto the snow. I was staring on the ground concentrating on my game when I noticed a shadow pass over the ground. My eyes automatically followed the movement. The shadow led my eyes over the ground to find two figures standing closely together. After a couple of moments I recognized who theses two figures were; they were my two best friends Andre and Charlie. A cloud came from both of their mouths simultaneously. Thinking it was only their breath I started to walk over to them. When I saw what was in their hands I stopped.

They called out to me, "Joey, come here." I looked up as though I hadnít seen them. I didnít have the strength to go over there. I could either lie to them and tell them I had to go home or I could go over and tell them, "Yeah Iíll have a cigarette." My legs felt like they were numb and the blood was cut off. It did take all of the strength in my body in order for me to move and I did, slowly but surely. "Wut up yo?" Andre said.

"Whatís happening?" I replied. Neither said anything but blew smoke in my face trying to be cool. Andre stuck a cigarette in my face and said, "You want a cigarette." I struggled to answer their question. I was thinking so hard that it felt as though I had pulled a muscle in my brain.

I could just imagine what my mom would say. "Anything interesting happen today?" "Nah, just smoked my first cigarette." Not exactly how it would go but close enough. If I did smoke one cigarette nothing terribly bad would happen, I probably wouldnít get addicted. So no real harm would be done. Then I thought about my grandma, sheís sixty‑four and has smoked her whole life and, now all she does is sit on the couch all day choking on her own smoke.

My friendship would be over if I said no. If they go, I wonít have any friends. It already took two years to make these friends. Weíd planned to make a band called, "The Frankfurters" and be famous by the time weíre fifteen. Iíve always wanted to be accepted and understood by my peers, not to be the one who is always humiliated all the time. If I smoke my mom might catch me but nothing horrendous would happen.

I grabbed the cigarette and said "Yeah, Iíll have a cigarette" Andre hand me the cigarette and light it. I inhaled deeply and coughed, but the smoke felt good in my lungs. I feel as though Iím in bliss. Andre and Charley chuckle at my cough and I smile at my incredible future that I imagine ahead.

My future didnít really turn out that way. Later in highschool they wanted me to take drugs and thatís where I drew the line. Itís twenty years later and Iím a doctor. I sit on that same couch and choke on my smoke just like my grandma. My life feels useless just because of one mistake.