Happiness

There is an ever-growing problem with our
world; unhappiness. Unhappiness has plagued
everyone at a time or two, sometimes even more.
Because of this our world is suffering
enormously: shootings, hate crimes, and wars are
a few results of this widespread unhappiness.
One might say there is no hope for our world,
but there is. To end this unhappiness everyone
should eat Skittles, own a goldfish, and get plenty
of sunshine.

One may ask, what can Skittles do? When the
question should be what can not Skittles do? Not
only can Skittles make you happy, they could
end world hunger. But the focus right now is on
ending unhappiness. Skittles, (by the author’s
own scientific research) can and will make
anyone 79% happier. So the next time someone
is stressed out at work, fighting with their spouse,
have no house, or lost their favorite shirt, don’t
worry, just eat Skittles! Imagine how much
happier the world would be, if instead of getting
sad or upset, everyone ate Skittles and therefore
made them happy.

In the case of goldfish, here are some reasons
why goldfish can end the world’s unhappiness.
Owning a pet will lengthen your life. People who
have the responsibility of the care of an animal
can have lower blood p-pressure and fewer
diseases. Goldfish make excellent pets because
they are easy to care for, interesting and friendly,
and won’t talk back. What more

proof does one need? Imagine if everyone could
have lower blood pressure, fewer diseases, and a
friend who will keep every secret! Well,
everyone can, if they buy goldfish. These
animals, when cared for correctly, and with the
frequent consumption of Skittles, can make the
world happy again.

Now, the last way to make everyone happy, is
by making sure the world gets plenty of sunshine.
Sunshine is vital in the life of human beings. It is
recommended for everyone to get at least fifteen
minutes of sunshine a day. Since sunshine is a
required bodily function, there is no excuse for
not getting any. Not only is it required, but
sunshine is the best reason to be outside. One
can go swimming, on a picnic, or eat Skittles in
the sunshine. Sunshine lets people stay fit,
healthy, and happy. So lets take advantage of this
ever-renewable resource, and get happy!

The world is a sad place, but it doesn’t have to
be. If everyone would just eat Skittles, own a
goldfish, and have fun in the sun, this
unhappiness could end. But until then it is still
recommended to consume Skittles as often as
desired. Another pathway to happiness the author
neglected, but is also a major one, is to own a
Harley Davidson, and drink Pepsi, everyday.

Category: Psychology